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Why is learning new skills as an adult so difficult?

As a 26 year old working in technology and software engineering you would think that learning new skills and new information would be easy. With the pace of artifical intelligence and software development, it should be second nature by now. The truth is, actively learning new skills is hard - like really hard.

A study in 2008 posited that the average American consumes 34 gigabytes of data per day.1 That was in 2008, 2 years before Instagram and almost two decades ago. If we consumed 34 GB in 2008, today’s constant stream of 15-second TikToks means our brains are context-switching thousands of times more per day.

With so much information being blasted at us daily, we have to be getting better at learning new skills, right?

Surprisingly, no, at least not for me. I find that learning new skills is getting harder and harder even with all of the tools at our disposal (shoutout YouTube University)! My attention span and focus are getting shorter and shorter, and my tolerance for being, feeling, and looking like a noob is close to zero. Which leads me to my first argument on why learning new skills is difficult as an adult: EGO.

EGO and being a noob

I think the older we get, the more self-conscious / self-aware we become. We are constantly looking at others and comparing ourselves, or feeling like we aren't sizing up the way we should to our peers. Or maybe you don't like to feel uncomfortable, or maybe you like to feel like the expert in the room. Well, none of those feelings are conducive to learning something new. In order to learn or try something new, you have to put yourself out there, and accept the fact that you may look like a noob when starting out. Our egos do not like the feeling of not knowing what to do or failing, but often failure is the quickest and most efficient way of acquiring new skills.

Well, what happens after you get over the initial hump of putting your ego aside in search of new hobbies or skills? The next major hurdle is finding time for deliberate practice.

Time, or lack thereof

The best way to learn something new is to put the reps in. That becomes really difficult when you are juggling working full-time, working out, spending time with friends and family, and maybe even looking after your parents or kids. Suddenly you can't find the time or can't afford to sacrifice the time you do have in order to chase after something new. This I think is the hardest part about acquiring a new skill, but there aren't many shortcuts to spending time learning something new. If learning skills were as easy as just doing it once and never again, we would all be Olympians or the equivalent of world class in all aspects of life.

Alright, well what happens when you do find the time? It becomes easy now that you've mastered ego and finding time for your hobbies, right?

Opportunity cost

Well, now you are dealt a choice: upskill for work (monetary gain) or upskill for pleasure (hobbies). This is actually deeply related to the lack of time, because if we had unlimited time then we wouldn't have to make a choice between hobbies. We could just do all of them all the time. But, if you want to get ahead at work or go back to school, that means now you have to sacrifice woodworking or playing in a band. Learning how to learn has probably already been achieved if you get to this stage of acquiring new skills, so that's not necessarily the problem, just choosing what to learn is.

3 things to try to solve the problems

  1. Try "microlearning" - spending 15-20 minutes a day on practicing whatever it is that you're trying to learn
  2. Seasonal learning - maybe you spend the first 3 months of the year upskilling for work, the next 3 months on learning the ukelele, the next 3 months getting a new certification, and so on
  3. Lower the stakes - it's absolutely ok to try something and realize it's not your thing anymore. It's also absolutely ok to try something and realize that this is your true calling. Not everything has to be high stakes or aimed at becoming a professional at your desired hobby

Learning new skills at the beginning is really hard, but staying curious and willing to try new things is essential to finding stuff that you're good at or that you truly enjoy.

References

  1. CNET ↩↩↩

2023: A great year for me, but a bad year for the world

Living is easy with eyes closed. - John Lennon

As this year comes to a close, it's so easy for me to put a bow on this year. It's been a great year for me personally; I've learned a lot, got a new job, and spent a lot of time with people who are important to me. But what about everyone else? Has it been a great year for them as well?

I doubt it has. There have been a lot of unfortunate events this year: war, impending doom due to climate change, mental health crises, and a bunch more that I'm undoubtedly forgetting.

It would be easy to ignore everything and act like my experience is the only experience. However, I don't think that's fair. It's not fair to those who have lost their lives due to their religious beliefs. It's not fair to people who have decided to take their own lives due to overwhelming stress and anxiety. It's also not fair to communities who have lost everything due to extreme weather events.

So how do us empaths go about our lives without feeling guilty and solemn all the time? I'm not sure I have the only answer, but here are a couple of things that I do that seem to help me balance the luxuries of my own life with attempting to alleviate suffering for others:

1. Be grateful for everything you have.

This is the easiest thing to do on this list, and it's free. If you and I went to a restaurant and ordered the exact same thing, and if I was grateful for the meal and you weren't, you can bet your bottom dollar that the meal would taste better for me than it would for you. Sitting down and trying to think of one or two reasons why I'm grateful for anything and everything at least once a week is a practice I've implemented this year, and although I'm not that great at it yet, I can tell that it's made me more appreciative of everything and everyone around me.

2. Donate or give away things you don't use, want, or need.

That Xbox One that's been sitting in your closet for the past 2 years after graduating from college could go from never used to never turned off. The old clothes that you hide in the corner of your closet could go from collecting dust to keeping people warm this winter. The little things add up. This practice also helps you declutter your life and focus on the things that matter.

3. Make small recurring gifts to a charitable cause that is important to you.

In my own life, I'm averse to donating large amounts of money at one time, but I am totally okay with spending $5 at Starbucks twice a week. One thing that's helped me become less of a glutton with my money is to make small recurring gifts to charitable causes in my community. Even though it probably adds up to more or less the same amount if I donated a lump sum once a year rather than small, frequent amounts, it's just easier for my brain to meet halfway with my heart when rationalizing it this way. Also, if you're a selfish altruist like me, sometimes you get cool gifts like socks or a t-shirt if you become a recurring donor rather than a one-time donor, which just helps with incentivizing our monkey brains into continuing to donate... but, if it works, it works.

4. Lastly, take a break from news every once in a while.

This one is pretty important too. It's sad to say that almost all of the news we consume is sad news, and it definitely takes a toll on us. Try to go a few days or a week every month without consuming any news, or replace all of your sad news consumption with cute animal videos or by picking up a new hobby. This also applies to social media. We all know that avoiding social media is almost always a good thing.

Even though there are so many sad things happening in the world, know that there are always good people out there, and there will always be people who care about you because I care about you!

Happy Holidays!

I leave you with these words of passage John 14:27:

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid.

Saying goodbye is hard

This is a 4 minute read.

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. - Winnie the Pooh

Throughout my life, I’ve had plenty to be thankful for. My mom left everything behind in Honduras in search of a better life in the United States and brought me with her. I’m thankful for that. I've also graduated from college with a bachelor’s degree, an achievement attained by only 7% of the world’s population.1 I’m thankful for that. Being able to wake up every day without worrying about my next meal or where I'll sleep tonight is something that I take for granted way too often, but I'm very thankful for that.

Recently, I’ve been reflecting on how grateful I am to have a job. Some people might not enjoy their job; some might even hate it. However, I consider myself fortunate to enjoy and feel passionate about what I do. I love spending hours trying to solve complex issues and the rewarding experience of being in a state of intense focus, which some might call "flow." In those moments, all that matters is the challenging problem I'm trying to solve, and the sense of timelessness while in flow state is extremely fulfilling.

It's also very rewarding when you are surrounded by great people. My colleagues have played a pivotal role in my professional and personal growth. I’ve had the opportunity to collaborate with talented architects, analysts, and engineers, and I've learned so much from these remarkable individuals. I’m very thankful for that. I’m also grateful for the opportunities I’ve had, being able to explore areas that interest me and having the opportunity to work with cutting-edge technology.

For all the reasons mentioned above, saying goodbye is so difficult. Goodbyes happen to be something I struggle with the most. It's challenging for me because I'm not particularly fond of change, especially when 40 hours of any given week are spent at work. It's way easier to stay where you are comfortable, especially if you are somewhat good at it.

Although it won’t be easy, embracing change is essential for personal and professional growth. It requires you to take risks, such as trying something new, in the hopes of it teaching you something you don't already know.

Goodbye, CapTech, and thank you for everything.

  1. “100 People: A World Portrait” 100people.Org, www.100people.org/statistics-details/. ↩↩↩